Body Positivity: Redefining Beauty on Our Own Terms

Beauty is defined by most by the color of someone’s eyes, face shape, body shape and often times skin tones. While preferences exist, no one shares the same attributes but everyone is beautiful in their own right. This brought about an idea to collaborate with Natonya,  an amazing fashion and body positive blogger with incredible style, to show how we redefine beauty on our own terms.

Erica’s Curve

20181211397370563We as women are put under pressure to be “perfect”, we have to be a certain size or color to be accepted. As a young girl these ideas of what women should be were forced into our faces all over television and movies. At some point we admired the woman men swooned over. Now, that we are older, more of us are noticing how toxic it is to compare ourselves to these unrealistic ideas of “perfection”.

This argument and fight to be loved the same will go on until people finally realize that no one is the same.

Being a woman is stressful, we deal with the bodily pain then we have to deal with the social pain. Social pain being wanting to take a picture of which we love, put it on social media just to be made fun of because we don’t look like the “Instagram model” as if that’s what qualifies us as beautiful. Those standards and the hate spewed throughout the internet is what causes people to change who they are.

Our bodies, skin tones, personalities and stories are all different for a reason. I am thankful for my thighs, hips, personality, and skin tone because it is ME! No one else’s acceptance matters more than my own!

This society we are in praises the Victoria Secret model over the real life fantasy! As women, we should uplift one another when we are compared for the attention of someone who only cares for the size of your butt or breasts. We are more than booty size.

My hope is one day we all accept one another and are accepted by others for being exactly who we are without the modifications and comparisons. If you must modify something about yourself do it for you and not because that’s how all the girls on Instagram look or because of a boys suggestion. In the end a real man will accept you for all that you are, imperfections included.

Love yourselves, your bodies, your personality and show that love to the next woman. If no one else will build us up we surely can. Let’s show the world all of the different body types, skin tones and ethnicity that are under represented and push for a change so we can all be seen, so we can all show young girls that when they grow up there is someone that looks like them to look up to.

Natonya’s Curve

Processed with VSCO with s2 presetThe woman’s body built like a work of art with intricate curves, textural-defined skin and a ravishing softness that makes anyone melt. God made people into a masterpiece hard to  duplicate, which is why we must value every part of our human form. Some ladies are slim-framed while others slip into the wider built category.

I’ve always had thick thighs, wide hips and a round butt. As a woman today, this type of figure is considered beautiful but my days in middle school and early high school years, it was described as “fat” and “funny looking”. Hearing someone tell me, “I’m fat” played with my self-esteem. I always hid my womanly shape at a young age behind baggy clothes and over-sized cardigans. I would even wear my favorite red knitted sweater in the summer because I didn’t like my arms, butt and hips. My mentality of hiding carried into adulthood. I still have moments where I struggle to embrace my physique because I get self-conscious when others stare. For some reason, I think they stare because something is wrong.

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My mother always bought me body hugging clothes such as tight pencil skirts and high-waist pants to show out my curves. She always emphasized to me, never hide your beauty because God makes no mistakes. Women like Iskra Lawrence and La’Tecia Thomas with similar body type like mine make it easier to fearlessly flaunt my figure in a fashion-friendly manner. I follow both women on Instagram because they represent what the body positive movement is all about, loving yourself in your own skin to redefine the meaning of beauty.

Body image is in the forefront because people are acknowledging beautifying the diversity of different sizes and shapes. We don’t need to look the same, in fact it’s important that we don’t look like the girl or guy next door. Following the aftermath of Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show controversy, Erica from GrandFashLife and I decided to write about our perspectives of the body image movement. Erica is one of my favorite fashion bloggers because she is supportive, innovative, kind and a talented designer. Be sure to follow her on Twitter for inspiration energy and check out her Instagram, she rocks some stylish beauty looks too.

IMG_20181211_191858Let me start by saying I have always shopped at Victoria’s Secret. As I became older and more educated about brands and their missions, I find myself less excited over the company and its marketing strategies. Earlier in May, I wrote a post about the inclusive and exclusivity in the body positive movement, declaring that it’s not necessary to pin one body category over another to celebrate the beauty of a specific body shape. I like movements that focus on body positivity by celebrating ALL shapes and sizes, similar to the community I built through @sheiconic. Be sure to read that post about my concept to understand the main points.

Victoria’s Secret made headlines because of the negative comments against featuring transgenders in their holiday spectacular runway show. Personally, I believe the company is allowed to have whoever they want to walk their runway. While it’s encouraging to have more body shape diversity in their show and campaigns, it’s their niche to feature slime-figured women, similar to Lane Bryant’s niche to focus on bustier and curvaceous women.

Let’s educate ourselves to the fact that there is something out there for everyone, we just have to find it or create a lane ourselves. I built @sheiconic because I wanted to see not only see women shaped like me but showcase how beautiful and confident other women are in their skin too. While I like the fact Victoria’s Secret highlights diversity of women through different race and nationalities, I’m against their lack of sincerity because this isn’t the first time the brand has been offensive. Once through campaigns described as the perfect body, which came across as ignorant to some because the brand neglected the fact that not everyone is shaped the same as their models. Processed with VSCO with s2 preset

I believe it’s our duty as women to lift and support each other and that includes celebrating our “flaws”. Let’s stop shamming someone for being naturally thin or hating on a woman’s cellulite. How about we compliment those features considered physical flaws and declare them as alluring attributes. Fall in love with the fact we’re all uniquely made and no one looks the same yet we’re united into one beautiful human race and that makes us all special.

Natonyas Social Media

27 thoughts on “Body Positivity: Redefining Beauty on Our Own Terms

  1. Wow, just wow. Thank you BOTH so much for collabing on this amazing piece. It has made me love myself, even more, just the way I am. I know it is obvious that we are all different, but Erica, you saying that actually got me thinking. Like we are ALL different, why do we continue to try to be like someone? So crazy.

    And Natonya, I love that you kinda accept Victoria’s Secret as them following their niche. I have been so mad about all the controversy there and I have decided to stop shopping there. But you are right, even if it’s wrong of them/how they speak about it, it’s their niche to feature slim women, so to each their own. I also followed your SheIconic Instagram. Love all that you stand for!

    Thank you both for this AMAZING piece. I am inspired by you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Abby, I am so happy to hear This! You are absolutely beautiful inside and out and although there is another woman named Abby somewhere in this world, you are your own unique self! Thank you so much for enjoying this post as much as we enjoyed writing This! ❤


  2. Love this, both of you are iconic! I love the message and meaning. We are meant to be ourselves even though that’s much easier said than done especially with social media and today’s society. It’s something we’re all working on and by hearing your two beautiful stories it makes it a little easier for everyone else out there!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much Deanna! We are all capable of loving ourselves and treating each other with the utmost respect, I can’t wait for that to be the theme of this world!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. You deserve to accept yourself flaws and all! We are all so unique and that’s what makes us beautiful. Thank you for reading this post! Continue to love you for you! ❤


  3. This is an amazing post – I think that this is such an important topic. It’s so important to love yourself and your body. I really agree that as women we should be lifting each other up, and supporting one another, not dragging each other down. It’s so important that we realise that there is not just one type of body that is desirable or ‘good’. You are still a woman and one body type, skin colour etc does not make you any less or more of a woman. (I hope this makes sense, I am very passionate about this topic).

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I love this! It took me so long to accept my body and love myself due to comments I dealt with and still have to deal with about my body and the way I look. I got a breast augmentation at a young age and the first thing my surgeon asked was if I was doing it for myself or for other women. I think we all know the answer to that one. 😦 I wish all women could read your post. Thank you for this message.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Jessie, you are beautiful and so strong! It takes a lot of work and self love to fully accept all that we are but I know we can do it! Thank you for sharing such a personal bit of your life, you are absolutely incredible! Change to better yourself and never for the sake of others because you being happy with you is all that matters ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  5. You are both so physically beautiful but even more when your personalities and confidence comes out through the pictures! Thank you for such a positive message. I am curvy with caramel skin and the world would love to have me down about it. Instead, I buy good quality clothes and stay fashionable. Do my makeup. I get my nails and hair done and live my best life. I look good for me. Not a man or other people. Just whatever I want. People always respond positively to my style when I am authentic about who I am and how I look. I really like that you encourage us to value our unique selves and personal life story. Definitely sharing.

    Teri –

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so very much!! It means a lot that you enjoyed this post, we put a lot of love and thought into it. Continue to put effort into loving and caring for yourself. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

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