Our entire lives we go through different traumatic experiences that overtime can break us down and take us out of character. Whether it be someone in your family or just a situation that brings you to a low point. As we continue to grow older, we realize that at some point we have to take a step back and say enough is enough! Being twenty-five years old now I can clearly identify my feelings, place a name on them and pinpoint the source of the problem. There have been moments when I have been extremely angry I searched for ways to hurt myself to get away from the life and people I had. It wasn’t until yesterday (Yes, I said yesterday.) that I noticed the damage I allowed other people and things to cause in my life simply because I continued forgiving.
As people, we feel it is our responsibility to forgive people that have continuously caused us pain or forgive situations that we didn’t ask to be placed into but that’s, not the case. With every problem comes a lesson that we must take away to learn what to do to not to end up in that certain situation again. Taking control of your life and the situations that happen within your life is the only way to truly walk away with your spirit still in tact. Here are four things I will begin to do to take control of my life:
1. Forgive from a distance
Not everyone deserves your presence or your voice! Learning that forgiveness doesn’t need to take place with a conversation with the person you are forgiving marks the first step to taking control of your life. I have dealt with controlling people my entire life; everybody from the person that assisted in my conception to another relative of mine have controlled many situations that I was put in. The thing that I learned yesterday was you don’t have to like them to forgive them! You don’t have to come to terms with the way they treated you to forgive them, you’re forgiving them for yourself so that those negative thoughts and feelings towards those people that hurt you no longer have to exist. Take control of your life by forgiving those people and situations ONLY for yourself!
2. Accepting Yourself For Who You Are
This is the most important thing you can do in not only taking control of your life but providing yourself with the life you deserve. There is no way for us to go about our daily life or even chase after our dreams if we are not at peace and in love with whom we are! Accepting yourself begins with how we treat and speak about ourselves because positive self talk is important in self-development. Especially as women we never feel we are good enough, and that must change in order to make it anywhere in this life. Believe in yourself and watch what it does to your confidence and spirit.
3. Chasing After Our Dreams
As a big dreamer I can say I haven’t had the easiest time making it in this life. I have been knocked me down more times than I can count but as a big dreamer and lover of seeing others flourish I know that in order for me to make it I have to fully believe I can. All of us have a unique talent that deserves to be seen and sitting back, waiting has never been the answer to going after your dream, after all its referred to as chasing your dreams for a reason! Take control of your life by creating the opportunity and going after the opportunity instead of waiting for that phone call or email. So, get organized, write out your desires and fight until you make it!
4. Don’t Take “NO” For An Answer
I know I’m not the only one that has been rejected or told we can’t do anything because of blah, blah, blah! How many times were you told that and you actually believed it? As perfect as it would be, life isn’t life if we don’t run into a few people who don’t believe in our personal capabilities but what do we do after we walk away from that situation? Let it get to us, get us angry, make us cry, etc. NO! I learned that in order to accept the cards that life gives you, don’t accept the cards that life gives you. I know that sounds crazy! But read it again! Just because something is placed within your life, doesn’t mean it’s meant to stay in your life. Let go of whatever you need to, to help clear your vision so you are able to see the bigger picture and get to your desired destination. Life is like a windshield, the more rain you are able to clear off, the more you‘re able to see through the darkness. Clean your windows and take control of your journey!
These are four things that I am implementing into my life immediately, especially as we enter into 2020! Don’t let anything, or anyone steers you off of your desired path with their negativity, don’t let anyone take you from yourself! Let‘s take control of our lives in EVERY aspect and shine as bright as we are supposed to!
Q: What’s something you are looking forward to letting go of before the New Year?
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